Growing up is complicated. It takes a while. For some of us, it takes a lot longer than for others. Does God expect us to grow up? Yes. In Ephesians 4:15, He tells us “Speaking the truth in love, we will in all things grow up into Him who is the Head, that is, Christ.” Paul warns us about needing the ‘milk’ of the gospel and not growing up enough to accept ‘solid food’ from the Word of God. So,…..
In “Choosing Life,” I told you about my dysfunctional family. Both my mother and my father were damaged people. They disowned me in 1975. In 1980, my father left my mother for a woman younger than me. My mother had been a diabetic since 1943. so my father left a very sick woman. He drained her bank accounts. I re-established contact with her when I learned that my father left. In 1987, her kidneys failed. I brought her into my…..
In “Choosing Life,” I told you that I was a single parent raising two boys. When I bought our house, I bought it because it had three bedrooms and the garage had been converted into a pool room complete with a pool table. I didn’t even look at the kitchen. I don’t cook. The boys would bring their friends over to play pool. I would sit in the family room, with the door to the pool room open. I had…..
In “Choosing Life,” I told you that I was disowned. I was a single parent, working 9 or 10 hours a day, 6 days a week, to feed my kids and pay the bills. I felt like I had been sold into slavery. And I had a sinus infection. So, on my way home from work one night, I had to stop at the pharmacy to pick up a prescription my doctor called in. Back in the car, I was…..
In my book, “Choosing Life,” I told you that I taught my sons when they were youngsters to be patient with older people. We called them LOC’s and LOD’s, Little Old Chicks and Little Old Dudes. I told them that older people had worked hard all their lives and that they could go as slow as they wanted. And that we were going to wait for them. Children need to be taught. Do you want to know why they move…..
Someone asked me what “love” was, so I looked it up. In I Corinthians 13, love is described as being patient and kind. Love does not envy or boast. It is not rude or selfish. It doesn’t get offended or keep score. Love is not happy when bad things happen, but it is happy when the truth is told. Love protects, trusts, hopes, and perseveres. To me, this is the definitive guide. I know when I am loved by this…..
The last thing I expected to do was to finish writing “Choosing Life.” I had written the first chapter of a book a few dozen times. Then I would put it away in a file to be forgotten forever. And so it was after I wrote the first chapter of this book. The next day, however, I woke up with an idea. By the end of the day, the second chapter was completed and filed away with the first chapter……
I was recently asked if it was difficult to share such personal, intimate stories from my life when I wrote “Choosing Life.” I’ll try my best to describe a mindset that I probably share with other people who were abused as children. My head is full of stories about me and about my family. But as I child I learned to disconnect from what was going on around me. I developed the ability to block out everything around me so…..
When I wrote “Choosing Life,” I told you a little about my father’s father. Grandpop worked in a rivet factory and, after the war, got my father started in that business. He was an Irishman, and therefore charming, but he was a drunk. Every Friday night he spent his whole paycheck at the local bar. Grandpop also had a short fuse. One time, when another man at the bar made him angry, he knocked him unconcious with a single punch……
Someone who recently read my book “Choosing Life” told me that my story made her angry at my parents. After a moment of enjoying the empathy, I realized what I had to tell her. The dysfunction did not start with my parents. It goes back I don’t know how many generations. Let me tell you about my mother’s mother, Gram. Gram’s mother died when she was in third grade. School was over for her. She was sent to live with her…..
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